Have you ever tried to contact your Member of European Parliament? You may struggle, as you never know where they might be hiding - Strasbourg (or Brussels?). But that's not the only riddle we are given by the great institutions holding us together. When coming up with a new law, the gargantuan machinery in Brussels (or Strasbourg?) from time to time spits out the most astonishing gibberish.

The author, future lawyer

Let us have a quick parade of some impressive examples. There are, of course, the European Court of Justice, the Court of First Instance and the European Court of Human Rights, keepers of the peace, persistantly unprejudiced, untechnical, closer to the people than to politics. This is done e.g. by ensuring „the continuation of farming, thereby maintaining a minimum population level or conserving the countryside in certain less-favoured areas“. What an anonymous approach to such a noble objective!

The most senior European judges stand shoulder to shoulder with the honorable European Commission, the Council and the Parliament. Responsible for the prosperity of Belgium’s capital, these colossal organisations flood the „Internal Market of Legislation“ (to extend the smorgasbord of European economic and legal terms by an adventurous neologism) with daring, innovative, yet unpretentious legal decisions embellished by melodic titles like „Regulation laying down detailed rules for the implementation of cross-compliance, modulation and the integrated administration and control system provided for in Council Regulation establishing common rules for direct support schemes under the common agricultural policy and establishing certain support schemes for farmers“. (You are free to go wild at http://eur-lex.europa.eu/.)

Fortunately, we can rely on legal researchers across Europe when it comes to decoding the most important verbal crimes. They are swift, they are cunning and they do not fear the confrontation: „If the European Commission held the moon to be made of cheese, the moon would not give a damn about what the European Commission said and it wouldn’t change the material it was made of.“

The above examples show that the Legalization of Europe is in good hands. And it is being closely watched. At this spot, through every new issue of E&M.

*cover photo by Marianne Nicolas

IN -1112 DAYS